I'M AN INTROVERT!!!!

So...for the longest time, I have always wondered about myself. I wondered why I seemed to have this incapability to socialize with others and even work in 9-5 job. I discovered something that is pretty eye-opening to me. Did you know that the ratio of extraverts to introverts is 3 to 1? Well it is! And you know what? I'm an introvert. And it's not a bad thing!
You see, I always wondered why every time I went to a big party or gathering where there were lots of people, noise, and constant stuff going on, I felt like I just wanted to crawl into a hole and stay there. It's like I felt like a dwarf in this party of 15 people. I thought I was weird for always running to the bathroom to hide for a few minutes. I thought I wasn't smart enough becuase I could never think of something to say if someone had asked me a question right on the spot. It always took me a while to think of an answer. Or, why I could never remember stuff when put on the spot. I also wondered why I would get so tired especially when going out. IT'S BECAUSE I'M AN INTROVERT!!!

I'm reading The Introvert Advantage: Thriving in an Extrovert World by Marti Oleson Laney. And truly, I wish I had read this book in high school. I'm sure it would have alleviated alot of my insecurities about myself. I learned that we introverts have the disadvantage living in a world that is mostly extraverts and built on by extravert people. I've learned that I just have to work with how I am in our culture.

I've learned that the reason why I get so tired and overwhelmed at parties is becuase my brain doesn't need a lot of stimulation to keep me energized. So, when I go into an environment where there is a lot of it, it's like over load and I start to crash. Huh! Makes sense! And the reason why I get stumped every time I get asked a question, it's becuase introverts take longer to process information. So, it's okay for me to say, "I'll have to think about that. Can I get back to you?". The challenge is getting back to the person becuase sometimes by the time I finally come up with my own conclusion, its way past and people may not even think of it anymore. AND! (the kicker), the reason why I can't always remember things right off the bat, is BECAUSE, it takes longer to dig into our long term memory! I had no idea! I'm not dumb!!! I just work differently! It's not that I don't want to get to know people and hang out with them, it's just that environment may not be suitable to where my brain and body can function at a calm state. And this book provides good tips for when we are in those situations. And I took the test it gives you in the book, and I am probably the extreme version of an introvert. I scored the highest score you could score on it.

You do not understand how huge of a relief this is for me! Why didn't I know this before? It would have helped me so much in school and work and in relationships too! Crazy. This book has really opened my eyes and helped me to discover myself so much more. I'm okay with being the quiet natured person that I am. It's okay for me to go and take a breather. It's okay that I don't remember the answer. I do know it, it just takes time to come to me. I'm not weird! I just work differently than the majority of people.

Seriously this book has lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. And if you have the same experiences I do, you should read this book! And if your an extravert, you should read this too. It talks of the differences of both, but focuses mainly on the introvert. It seriously helped my understanding of people and why people react or behave in certain ways.

Truly. I feel great. I will never look at myself the same way again.